Archives for category: National Football League
I guess this makes it “Official”, as far as the consummate all-around football player goes, Tom Brady is the BEST there is, the BEST there ever was, and in all likelihood, probably the BEST there ever will be:
I realize some people might refer to this song as a, “Sports Bro-Mance”, others could probably refer to it as, just plain Gay, but it’ll definitely be the LAST TIME I post it here on the Internet. Besides that, I’m a big music fan of the late, great Kenny Rogers
From a perspective of a New England Patriot’s fan, watching Monday Night Football last night was sort of like attending a Funeral of your favorite sports team.
The Patriots, who literally dominated the past two Decades of the NFL’s American Conference Eastern Division, now found themselves on the receiving end of a humiliating beat down against the Buffalo Bills, a team they used to literally toy with for the past 20 years.
Since Bill Belichick became the Patriots’ coach at the start of the 21st Century, New England was never swept by a Division opponent in one season until, of course, the Bills changed that last night. In the Belichick regime, the Pats played in nine (9) Super Bowl championships and won six (6) titles.
This season, with future Hall-of-Fame quarterback (who’s 43 yoa) Tom Brady playing with the Tampa Bay Buccaneers, the Patriots will have a losing record and won’t even make the Play-offs.
What’s especially funny about this whole situation is that just prior to either Brady signing with the Patriots, or Belichick becoming the Head Coach, New England was sort of like the joke of the NFL. To be perfectly honest, I never thought I’d live to see the day the Patriots would ever win an NFL title, YET, they’re now tied with the Pittsburgh Steelers on being the team with the most Super Bowls.
I never dreamed anyone would ever use the words “New England Patriots” and “sports Dynasty” together in the same sentence.
Needless to say, I know it might be a while before the Patriots are Super Bowl champions — I sure hope I’m wrong on that fact. I do feel, extremely blessed and fortunate to have been a Patriots fan, literally, as long as I can remember. For that, I’d like to thank current Patriot owner Robert Kraft, Coach Belichick, Tom Brady and the many others who helped make this past “Dynasty” possible. I hope and pray you guys will win another Super Bowl real soon.
Ex-Baltimore Raven running back Ray Rice and his beautiful “battered” wife, Janay Palmer
Ray Rice jokes for DAYS!
http://www.reddit.com/r/Jokes/comments/2fzpua/ray_rice_jokes_for_days/
There’s like maybe four or five jokes in this list that were already posted on the internet, but the rest of this list was pretty much made up by me while I was bored. Ray Rice’s incident is a gold mine of humor….just not for him. Easily offended need not apply here. Enjoy.
1.) Ray Rice’s wife just set up a website for victims of domestic violence.
She got 200 hits in the first hour.
2.) Ray Rice is gonna pursue a career as a rapper now.
I don’t think Janay is gonna like his hits.
3.) Ray Rice is getting his own show on the Food Network.
It’s called “Can’t Cook? Left Hook!”
4.) What’s Ray Rice’s favorite drink?
Punch.
5.) If you can’t beat em, join em. If you CAN beat em, it’s because you’re Ray Rice.
6.) If Janay leaves Ray Rice, she’ll literally be a hit single.
7.) What does Ray Rice and Chris Brown have in common?
“Beat it” on their iPods.
8.) Why is Janay Rice lousy with directions?
She can’t take a left.
9.) Bartender just made me a drink called a “Ray Rice”
Whew, this thing really packs a punch.
10.) Trapping youself in an elevator while a man twice your size beats you.
They call that the Rice Bucket Challenge.
11.) I cut the sleeves off my Ray Rice jersey.
Now it’s a wifebeater.
12.) Why does Janay hate smoking weed?
Because she can’t take a hit.
13.) What’s Ray Rice’s favorite song ever?
“Shut up” by the ‘Black eyed’ Peas.
14.) What’s Janay’s favorite song ever?
“Hit me with your best shot”
15.) What’s the difference between Janay and an elevator?
When Janay Rice goes down, she doesn’t go back up.
16.) What happens when Ray Rice gets in your elevator?
You don’t remember it.
17.) It’s a custom for people to throw rice at weddings.
It’s a custom for Ray Rice to throw punches before weddings.
18.) How do you heal a bruise left by Ray Rice?
You use a Ricepack.
19.) What do you call it when Ray Rice throws punches in an elevator full of Mexicans?
Red beans and rice.
20.) What happens when Janay Rice enters an airplane?
It goes the BLEEP down.
21.) How long does it take Ray Rice to get mad?
About 3 floors.
22.) How hard does Ray Rice punch?
Beats me.
23.) What do you call it when Ray Rice beats his pregnant wife?
Eggbeater.
24.) Janay Rice has her own line of headphones.
It’s called “Beats” by Ray.
25.) How did Janay find out Ray was cheating on her?
She could taste lipstick on his knuckles.
26.) What does Ray Rice do when his dishwasher stops working?
He beats her in an elevator.
One Bad Decision Away From Homelessness 